When To Weep

By Emy Louie. Edited by MM.

The first time I bawled my eyes out openly in semi-public was at the funeral of my late paternal grandmother who raised me from childhood. In many ways, she acted as my mother and was always home (already retired) when I got home from school. One memorable thing was that she made me homemade french fries after school–among the many foods she cooked for me–quite typical of a Chinese mother.

At her funeral, I thought, “This is the best time to weep. I might as well get out the emotions now.” And boy, did I, at age 40–a grown adult.

Sometimes, it’s just hard to weep at funerals.

I recall watching Kung Fu movies that showed funerals. A bunch of women (strangers) are brought into the funeral to stoke the funeral attendees to weep.

That reminds me of “professional party-ers” who are hired to be at Bar Mitzvahs to stoke everyone to start dancing. I’ve seen it first hand.

Sometimes, it’s hard to weep and we need reminders to say “it’s okay to feel this way.” It will all be okay.